Book Lover's Paradise

Thousands of readers, hundreds of writers and one moi. Yesterday was an amazing day at the LA Times Festival of Books!

I saw LA Times journalist Sandy Banks interview Maria Bello about the actress' book Whatever: Love is Love. I saw celebrity LA chef Ludo Lefebre give a cooking demonstration of a recipe from his Crave cookbook for vegetable broth-poached fish and radishes, which made me hungry. 

Also I listened to a talk about books, writing and reading online by panelists Mallory Ortberg from The Toast, Patrick Brown from Goodreads and Carol Edgarian of Narrative Magazine. Then I went to my booth, hung out with fellow writers, like Kimberly Robeson,

talked to a bunch of people and sold plenty of copies of my book Evolution of a Wine Drinker! 

It was a great day on the University of Southern California campus! Go Trojans, Go book lovers! Go wine drinkers!

As for today, I'm putting my feet up and reading the books I bought at the Festival, which is more delicious than Ludo Lefrebre's broth-poached fish recipe.

But next April I'll be back at the LA Times Festival of Books. Will you?

I Won!

"WOW!" I said leaping from my computer and rushing to the kitchen.
"What's happening?" Mr. Wonderful said setting his espresso cup on the breakfast table.
"I won. Well, my book won Best Humor Book of 2015!"
"Congratulations!" he said taking me in his arms and swinging me around the kitchen.
"Although today's April first. Do you think it's an April Fool's joke?"
"...Nah."

Two weeks ago my book EVOLUTION OF A WINE DRINKER was nominated by the indie book review site Big Al's Books and Pals as Best Humor Book of 2015! Since this was a reader's choice award, readers got a chance to vote for their favorite humor books, crime thrillers and paranormal vampire romances.

So THANK YOU readers for voting for my book! I literally could not have won without you! Thank you so much!

But then... maybe me winning is just an April Fool's day joke?
... Nah.

Again, here's the Good News!

My Book Nominated!

Another fancy Saturday of feeding the chickens, taking out the trash and cleaning out Jackson's litter box.

But things really turned up when I learned my book Evolution of a Wine Drinker was nominated as the Best Humor Book of 2015 on Big Al's Books and Pals website! Yippee! A while back Big Al's gave my book a 5-star review and now this? 

Thank you reviewers of Big Al's Books and Pals. I appreciate this nomination and all the work you do reading, reviewing and promoting writers and books. Also, congratulations to the other three humor writers who received nominations in my category! I'm among some talented funny people.

Now I've never done this before but...

Evidently this is a "Reader's Choice Award" so... if any readers of my book would like to vote for it, you can do so via this link. At the link's site, just go to the blue box at the bottom that looks like this:

Sign in with your email address or Facebook. They request a sign-in to limit people to voting just once for each category. No stuffing the ballot box at Big Al's!

Also, voting closes on March 28 at 11 PM Pacific Standard Time, which is just two weeks away. So if you're going to vote, and I hope you do, sooner is better than later!

Thanks for your support! And thanks to Big Al's Books and Pals! Cheers!

Holiday Book Gift

“I read your wine book,” my friend said over a bottle of Italian Amarone.

“Thank you,” I said toasting to her with a full glass.

“I loved it.”

“Thank you.”

“I’m giving it to my friends for the holidays!”

“Aww, thank you!”

The fact that a friend enjoyed my wine book, Evolution of a Wine Drinker, was my gift this holiday season. It sure feels good making others feel good. And with wine and laughter how could one feel anything but good? Mission accomplished!

Happy Holidays!

Good News x2 and Bad News

“Here’s an after-dinner espresso,” I said setting a small cup and saucer on the table. 

“Good idea,” Mr. Wonderful said rubbing his hands together in anticipation.

“To go with it I made biscotti.”

“Great idea.”

“And homemade tiramisu.”

“… What’s wrong?”

Mr. Wonderful is very astute. He tells me things about me that I can’t even tell how he could tell them because they are so telling. One time he came home from the studio after 10 PM and said, “Has your sister called?”

“No. Why?”

“She’s going to call you tonight.”

“If she hasn’t called by now, she won’t call at all.”

At 10:45 PM she called. How Mr. Wonderful knew she would call,  I have no idea. In fact Mr. Wonderful didn’t know how he knew it either. He called it a premonition. I called him lucky.

This time he didn’t get lucky with a premonition of a phone call, he just saw me piling on the good Italian sweetness and figured: I was in the dumps; I was planning a Godfather movie viewing marathon; I wanted to eat my way to happiness. He is so lucky at guessing what is up with me.

“What’s going on,” he asked dunking a biscotti into the cup of espresso.

“I have good news, bad news and more good news.”

“Well lay it on me.”

I started with good news #1: a TV sitcom I wrote made the Semi-Finals of the PAGE Awards, a very prestigious screenplay writing competition in Hollywood.

Mr. Wonderful looked at me blankly.

“I means my sitcom was one of the top 25 written sitcoms of the year.”

“That’s great!” Mr. Wonderful said high-fiving me.

Then I progressed to the bad news, which was that this same TV sitcom did not make the cut to be among the Finalists.

He smiled and nodded dumbly.

“It means my sitcom was not one of the top 10 sitcoms of the year.”

“I still liked it,” Mr. Wonderful said giving me a fist bump.

It was nice that he liked it but I would have been stoked if more PAGE judges had liked it enough to make it a Finalist.   

Sigh.

A long time ago I learned to end on a high note, so I reminded my spouse and biggest cheerleader that I had one more piece of good news. 

“Guess what the good news is,” I said biting into the tiramisu.

“I have no idea,” he shrugged.

“Don’t you have a premonition or feel lucky about guessing it?”

“Nope.”

So I told him: My book Evolution of a Wine Drinker was reviewed by Big Al's Books and Pals, the respected book review website, and received its highest marks—5 Stars!

“That’s awesome!” Mr. Wonderful said picking me up and swinging me around the kitchen. I couldn’t stop laughing. Nor could he. 

Sometimes it’s good to forget premonitions and live in the moment with great book reviews and delicious tiramisu with the man of The House. Here’s to good news!

Taking it Off

“I’ll be home late tonight,” Mr. Wonderful's voice said over the phone.

“That's too bad,” I said standing on the kitchen table.

“How so?”

“Because tonight, everything's coming off.”

“… Excuse me?”

No one works harder than Mr. Wonderful. The guy gives a 110% every day to every job and everything he does. But it’s exactly because of his giving, hard-working nature that sometimes the home improvement jobs at The House get started then stall because he’s doing things for other people, places and things. So that’s when I step in to finish the job.

Yes I: the woman who’s good at hammering nails and better at removing them. Yes I: the woman who excels at breaking a concrete sarcophagus in the backyard. YES I! The woman who knows there are two types of screwdrivers—the Phillips and the vodka/orange juice cocktail. 

So when Mr. Wonderful called to say he would be home late, I planned to surprise him by taking the rest of the paint off the kitchen walls and ceiling all by myself. So I slipped into something more comfortable—namely my painting shirt and yoga pants—and went to work. By my paint removal calculations there were seven coats of paint on the kitchen walls: five coats of various whites, over mint green over refried-bean tan. Evidently when the previous owners wanted to change their kitchen’s look, all they did was paint it again and again. And Again.

By comparison, the ceiling had a measly four coats of whites including: off-white, on-white, bright white and dirty white.

With the walls and ceiling stripped down to their naked plaster, I cracked open the paint cans, stirred the paint and set to work on redressing the walls and ceiling in a new, elegant white paint. Woo-wee! He was going to be impressed I’d taken all this paint off. And put more paint back on. I couldn’t wait to see his happy face!

Around 11 PM I heard my spouse’s car in the driveway. He hurried inside to find me standing behind the refrigerator wearing my paint-splattered shirt and yoga pants.

“Welcome home!” I said blowing a lock of paint-sprinkled hair out of my eye line.

“… Hey,” he said his voice dropping off.

“So what do you think?” I said swinging my arm around the room.

“I thought you said ‘everything's coming off tonight’.” 

“Everything did come off. In fact I scraped every last paint chip off the walls and ceiling but since you still weren’t home, I started painting again.” His face fell. This was not the happy husband I was hoping to surprise with my painting removal and reapplication. “Don’t you like what I’ve done?”

“Of course,” he looked at his feet. “But when you said ‘everything’s coming off tonight” I thought you meant something other than paint.”

“… like clothes?”

“… For instance.” 

“Well the night’s still young,” I said dumping the paintbrush in the can and stepping out from behind the refrigerator. He smiled. “But first tell me what you think of my painting!”

As the Kitchen-Redo (Re)Turns (A Soap Opera)--Part 2

When her husband speaks of problems, should she be concerned?

Is a kitchen redo ever done?

Once a heart beats quickly, will it always beat quickly?

Find out now on the latest installment of New House Girl—As the Kitchen-Redo (Re)Turns… Part 2!

When we last met the New House Girl, our feminine heroine was as close as a woman can get to a man… while cutting holes in the kitchen ceiling. Side by side they had drawn holes, cut holes and together made long, hot, sweet… messiness of their kitchen. As they say in Buenos Aires: It takes two to tango. And: There’s only one Evita Peron. And: Don’t Cry for Me, Argentina. And: !Ay, caramba! Actually those beef-eating South Americans are very talkative, which is more than the New House Girl (uh, I) could say for herself and her stoic spouse. Looking back on their entire relationship, she could remember him saying just two things to her: “I do” on their wedding day. And yesterday, “About these lights, there’s only one problem.”  

“A problem!” she gasped. Her breath came fast, she gulped air into her lungs mostly because she was wearing a totally impractical peasant dress with a bodice that barely covered her heaving bosom. She tossed her hair back with a move so elegant she must have looked like Grace Kelly, Elizabeth Taylor or at least Miss Piggy. She looked up at her man’s strong jaw, Roman nose and irascible eyes. He was a rake, impossible and her Guiding Light but suddenly she knew just what she had to say to him. Her lips trembled, parted and finally formed the words, “What do you mean, ‘problem’.”

Now a word from our sponsors. 

You love wine! You love comedy! And you loved reading about both of them in Evolution of a Wine Drinker, which you told all your friends about! Well, good news! Evolution of a Wine Drinker’s author is releasing another comedy book this summer! The new book contains stories about comedy, travel and some wine all in one book! More details are coming soon! Check this website for more information!

Now back to our program, As the Kitchen-Redo (Re)Turns… Part 2.

“What ‘problem’ are you talking about?” she said again because they always repeat the same statement after a commercial break. He wiped the sweat from his brow then looked deep into her green-blue-gray-hazel-brown-India-ink-jet-black eyes. 

“We’re going to have to repaint the kitchen.” 

“You mean,” she laughed “Just the ceiling,” she lifted her face to him revealing her beauty mark… which was one of several splotches of dirt and plaster that had fallen on her sweat-drenched skin during their saw-cutting fest.

“No,” he shook his head. “The whole kitchen.”

“Mister, I’ve got everything you need,” she said lifting… a gallon of Behr’s Elegant White paint and two brushes. “One for you and one for me,” she said running a brush over his muscular forearms.

“Not so fast,” he said standing so close she could hear his heart beat quickly. Perhaps he should have his heart checked out by a doctor at General Hospital? She made a mental note of calling the local Ophthalmologist and scheduling EKG, ESP and FYI tests for her husband. Speaking of her husband, he was still speaking, “First” he said “We have to remove all the old coats of paint, down to the plaster. Only then do we repaint the room and ceiling.”

“Down to the plaster?!” she said as a tear leaked from her left eye. He watched the tear cascade down her cheek, off her chin, around her ear, and circle her neck—three times—before resting on her ample bosom from which he heard her heart beating quickly. Perhaps she should have her heart checked out by her favorite Dentist at General Hospital? He stepped forward to tell her this but she moved way from him flipping her hair like Miss Piggy. What a woman, he thought! And what a muppet! When another tear escaped her right eye he suddenly realized the pain he had caused his spouse. What a fool he had been to put her in this position! He had not been upfront about what this job would entail. If only he had controlled his unquenchable need; his hungry heart; his burning desire… to put LED lights and a dimmer switch into the kitchen ceiling. 

“I’m sorry I made you cry,” he said taking her into his arms. With her head resting on his shoulder she felt like a child or at least All My Children. From this angle she also got a wide view of the ceiling and realized he was right—they’d painted the kitchen before when they’d done the first kitchen redo. But now they needed to do it… and do it right… on this second kitchen redo. Their eyes exchanged a look. Suddenly she and he both desired the same thing. Her hand grabbed what he wanted her to… a paint scraper. 

“One for you and one for me,” she whispered handing him a paint scraper of his own. Then she climbed on top of… the ladder and gave into the thrill, the unbridled pleasure of scraping off paint! Yes, yes, YES!

In one hour-long episode she learned that she should be concerned when her husband spoke of problems but that together they could handle any problem that came their way. Also she decided that a kitchen redo does begin and end. But there can always be a second kitchen redo or a third kitchen redo. Although if they had a third redo she would definitely complain in her next therapy session with a Surgeon, Oncologist or Radiologist. 

Finally, after medical appointments at General Hospital and Grey’s Anatomy, she learned that if a heart beats quickly, it’s usually related to stress, 16 cups of espresso or being scared of embarking on a second kitchen redo right after finishing the first kitchen redo. But once the kitchen work was done everyone’s heart rate should return to normal. At least that’s what the Proctologist said.

Standing in the kitchen with her husband scraping paint off the walls together, she looked forward to more Days of Our Lives. Or at least to finishing this @#$% second kitchen redo job!

As the Kitchen-Redo (Re)Turns (A Soap Opera)--Part 1

Can she cut holes in the ceiling?
Will she destroy her kitchen to improve it?
Is her husband crazy or inspired?

Find out now on the latest installment of New House Girl—As the Kitchen-Redo (Re)Turns.

But before we bring you the latest adventure, first a recap of what’s been happening lately. For the entire month of April the New House Girl has been interrupted while she’s (uh, I’ve) been traipsing through the Low Countries eating waffles in Belgium, chocolate pralines in Brussels and partying in the orange-loving Netherlands. But now April’s good times are over and it’s back to the ranch in sunny California for more home improvement, kooky cats and kookier neighbors.

When we last saw the New House Girl she was debating her relationship with her husband, specifically: what to do with the kitchen ceiling. Seated at the table across from her spouse she looked at his strong arms, his wide chest, his thick hair.
“I love…” she said breathlessly “Everything about our kitchen.”  He raised a rakish eyebrow before his dark eyes met hers with a smoldering look. He inhaled the air scented with her one-of-a-kind perfume—a base of oregano and tomatoes from the pasta sauce she’d made mingled with the swimming pool chlorine in her hair. He exhaled.
“Want to punch a hole in the kitchen ceiling?”

Now a word from our sponsors.

Do you like wine? Do you like to laugh? Then get the wine book guaranteed to make you laugh about wine. Evolution of a Wine Drinker! “The most fun you can have with wine without touching it!” says an unknown person in an unknown paper.  Available in paperback and the Kindle!

Now back to As the Kitchen-Redo (Re)Turns—

“But why?” she gasped, her bosom heaving. Although she was young and restless, she was still trying to wrap her brain around his question. Perhaps the doctor at General Hospital was right and her spouse was crazy and addicted to… living in a disaster zone. The doctor would know everything about psychological and addictive personalities since he was a trained… gynecologist. After all, a doctor is a doctor, right? Her tongue flicked over her lips and she leveled her gaze at her spouse and pouted, “But we just finished redoing our kitchen.”

Then he spoke to her of LED lights and how they were energy efficient and cool (as in, they did not heat up when turned on, unlike her) and how he could put them on a dimmer switch. His words were very persuasive. As were his arms and all his tools. Before she knew what was happening he was standing on a ladder drawing circles on the ceiling of where the new recessed LED lights should go. Then standing close to her he unhooked… the existing overhead lamps. Then she grabbed that symbol of manliness… a saw. Before she realized it, he lifted her onto… the ladder where she cut a hole in her own kitchen ceiling! Yes, YES! Causing havoc in a room she’d already redone was dangerous, stimulating and so thrilling!

She punch-cut holes in the ceiling. She destroyed her kitchen to improve it. And the man of her dreams was not crazy but totally inspired! Doctor General Hospital was wrong. Aren’t those doctors always wrong? Man oh man: these LED lights were going to be great! She hugged her inspired husband.

“About these lights,” he said looking into her bold and beautiful face, “There’s only one problem…”

What is that problem? Find out on the next installment of the New House Girl on As the Kitchen-Redo (Re)Turns!

Vacationing in the Low Countries: Reflections on Writing about Belgium and the Netherlands

This was my second year participating in the A-Z Blogging Challenge. Last year I wrote about wine--which became part of my comedic wine book, Evolution of a Wine Drinker. Meanwhile this year I wrote about the Low Countries. As an American who's spent beaucoup time in Belgium and the Netherlands I gambled that I had enough material to write for a whole month about these two adjacent, diverse yet different countries.

I should have bet double or nothing because I would have won big time. I had so much to write about  I ended up cutting material. I'm a good gambler.

Like last year, I wrote a list of A-Z topics in advance but did not write the actual blog post until the day it needed to be posted. Writing this way is a great challenge to me and I enjoyed it. While last year I found it tiring to write every day, this year my blog post was just one of the several things I was writing: namely a novel, a screenplay and comedy sketches. My writing work ethic has improved in one year and the A-Z Blogging Challenge has helped that.

As a side note I learned during the challenge that a screenplay I wrote made the top six finalists in a screenplay competition. From these six, one finalist will be chosen to have their screenplay made into a movie. The finalist winner will be announced in June.  Pretty exciting stuff.

During the A-Z Challenge month I switched between writing about the Netherlands then writing about Belgium. For example, I wrote A is for Amsterdam, B is for Brussels, C is for (Dutch) Canals, D is for (Belgium's) Diamonds, etc. this worked well and kept things lively.

This year I had the label of (HU) for Humor and I'm glad I did for it helped readers identify me as a humor writer. Just in case they didn't get my hilarious, knee-slapping jokes.

I visited a number of other blogs which, like last year, reminded me how vast the world and blogosphere are. It's a good reminder. Since I couldn't visit all of them in April I plan to try to visit the rest now that the Challenge is over.

The two best things about this year's Challenge were: 1) The people reading and leaving comments; and 2) Trying out a non-humourous post on my blog. About the first, the comments are proof that the reader read the post, which always makes me happy. As for the second--the un-funny writing--when writing about Belgium, I felt I had to write about Ypres, the Belgian town and site of five big World War I battles. With this year being the 100th anniversary of that War to End All Wars, I took a gamble that my usual and new readers would go with me on the sad, historical journey to Ypres to remember the 1.7 million soldiers and civilians who died near Ypres over the four years of the war. I should have bet triple or nothing. Not only did they go with me, they spoke and wrote to me about it afterwards. Not everything in life is funny. Sometimes we have to suppress our funny bones and feel with our hearts. Writing about Ypres showed me that.

All of which brings me back to the best thing about the Challenge: the people.

Thanks to all the people who read my blog, participated in the Challenge, and wrote their own blog(s). Finally, a special thanks to all those writers who organized this year's wonderful event! For me it was even better than last year!

I gambled and learned so much in this year's Challenge, so now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to the racetrack to gamble on California Chrome in the Preakness!

Evolution of a Chair

"Doesn't it look beautiful," I said to lifting the chair out of the convertible.
"Yes," Mr. Wonderful said smiling in the driveway.
"The new fabric makes it pop!"
"Yes."
"I can't wait to sit in it!"
"You and someone else..."

I didn't have time to contemplate who he was talking about. But yes, not only did my spouse and I fix up The House, the Guesthouse and the backyard birdhouse, we even fixed up some of our furniture. There are few joys like taking an old piece of furniture, reupholstering it and making it a new piece of furniture.

The chair in question was given to me by a friend whose mother had gotten it at a Hollywood garage sale some years ago. It had a metal frame and was covered in a faded brown vinyl fabric. Why would someone cover a chair in vinyl? My friend's mom paid $45 for the secondhand piece and estimated that it dated to the 1950s or even late 1940s. Since she never used the chair, she gave it to her daughter who felt the same way about it and gave it to me. I loved the lines on it and had a vision of what I wanted. I drove to Downtown Los Angeles where fabric stores are as plentiful as sand on Long Beach and within 10 minutes I found the fabric: A western theme in red, blue and white wool.

The upholsterer did an excellent job removing the vinyl back and seat and recovering it with the western fabric. The whole chair really popped! I sat on it. Firm, functional and beautiful. I loved it!

Some evolutions happen quickly. My chair evolved from a garage sale find to a conversation piece overnight! 

After work I met my friend for coffee to thank her for the chair and tell her how well it turned out. She was gracious saying how happy she was that I enjoyed it so much.

When I got home that night Mr. Wonderful met me at the door. 

"You have to see where the cat is." He led me to the room with my gorgeous western chair and there was our feline. Lounging on it, fur all over it, exposed claws which had been sharpened on it.

My heart sank.

"My chair! But I love sitting in it!"

"I told you you wouldn't be the only one."

Evolutions are slow: Neanderthals evolved into homo sapiens over thousands of years. 

I evolved from a wine novice to a knowing wine drinker in a couple years. 

My chair evolved from garage sale find to conversation piece to cat scratcher in one weekend! 

If I'd had a firmer fabric maybe Jackson wouldn't have attacked my chair. Or may he would have. There's only one thing I know for certain: next time I recover that chair it's going to be in vinyl!

Thanks, Book Soup!

A local bookstore.
Some reading.
A glass of wine.

These are the ingredients for a wonderful author's day. Yesterday I had a book reading and signing of my book EVOLUTION OF A WINE DRINKER at Book Soup, a beautiful, smart local bookstore. The event was fun, funny and thrilling!

The bookstore staff was helpful. Thanks, Molly!

The bookstore tweeter was busy. Thanks, Dan! 

The audience asked questions! Thank you, audience!

Afterwards we celebrated with glasses of white wine and rosé.

The bonus: no one fell asleep. Major score!

It was a very good day author's day. So good in fact I'm going to remember that recipe and make that type of day again soon!

Book Soup!

I like books.

I like soup.

But I love Book Soup!

Today I'm having a book event at West Hollywood's famous bookstore, Book Soup!

Nestled between the Sunset Strip's oversized movie billboards, Gordon Ramsay's Restaurant at the London Hotel and The Viper Room is this wonderful local bookstore.

I'll be reading and signing books starting at 4 PM. I hope to see you there!

P.S. There's parking behind the store!

Super News

No.
Really?
Wow!

Yesterday the New England Book Festival took place in Boston, Massachusetts. The grand prize-winning book of the festival was Salt, Sugar, Fat: How the Food Giants Hooked Us written by Pulitzer Prize-winning author Michael Moss and published by Random House.

Also, at the New England Book Festival, my book Evolution of a Wine Drinker, received an Honorable Mention in the Wildcard Category. (They didn't have a Wine Category, Comedy Category or Funny Vino Book Category.)

Wow! My book was honored at the same festival as Moss' Salt, Sugar, Fat book! It feels so good to be in such distinguished company!

Wow, wow, WOW!

Thank you New England Book Festival!

My Cat, His Cat

"You want to do it?" I said shaking it up. 

"No, thanks," Mr. Wonderful said grabbing his jacket.

"It'll be good times." 

"I don't think so," he said walking out the door.

"You're going to miss the all fun!"

Actually, what I was "shaking up" was a can of paint, and the "fun" was painting the interior of my kitchen cabinets. Oh yeah! Mr. Wonderful didn't think this endeavor sounded like a good--or even mediocre--way to spend a Saturday night but that's only because he hadn't spent two days sanding down all the surfaces in said cabinets. For me, everything I'd done all weekend was building toward this moment of painting. Bring it!

Instead, the man who promised to love, honor and dip my brushes arranged a game night with his buddies and left me to the paint and rollers. Thank goodness I have my cat! 

While my spouse was cracking open beers with his pals, Jackson kept me company as I coated the interior cabinet shelves, walls and ceilings with Behr paint--color Elegant White, if you please.

While my spouse was losing his shirt in a "friendly" game of poker, my cat and I took a drink break: milk for me and a glass of Pinot Noir for him. Or was it the other way around? Paint fumes do funny things to your brain when the only one you can talk to is a feline who responds with intelligent looks, frequent naps and lots of licking.

While my spouse was buying drinks for the winning poker player, my cat and I cleaned up--he did the kitchen, I licked his fur. Or was it the other way around? Then we both fell asleep in our respective beds. Who needed a spouse? I had all the Saturday night companionship I needed from my cat: 1) My dear Jackson made my life more fun; 2) He gave me more good times; 3) He ate all the leftovers. I loved my cat!

The next morning, I examined the painting work. Peering inside the kitchen cabinets I saw… cat paw prints; a line of dirty cat paw prints that ambled about the space like Billy from the "Family Circus" cartoon. Ugh. While my husband and I had slept, Jackson had gone exploring inside the cabinets. With the paint still wet.  

Unfortunately now my cabinets were neither elegant nor white. Ugh-ugh-uuugh. I'd have to paint the cabinets again in another coat to cover the paw prints. Whose pet does that? Not mine.

As soon as Mr. Wonderful wakes up I'll make him a cup of delicious espresso, tell him how fun painting was last night and let him know what his cat did! 

Wine Gift Ideas

This year I'm giving everyone on my Christmas list wine-related gifts.

Mr. Wonderful is getting wine. He already has a lot, but more won't hurt him. Or me!

My 86 year-old neighbor, Harold, will get a bottle of sweet eiswein. Maybe it will sweeten him up?

Jackson the cat will get a cork cat toy, which I know he will write me a kind "thank you" note for and cherish for many years to come.

If you're looking for wine gifts for Christmas, check out these wine-y ideas!

Cheers!

Giveaway Books Given Away

The Goodreads giveaway for my book, Evolution of a Wine Drinker, has ended. Which means there are five people who will now get a signed copy of my book. I hope they like wine…

Just so they know, and you know, and they know that you know: the books are in the mail!

I hope the packages arrive by Christmas! If not, we'll blame snow, international customs, and more international snow.

Thanks to everyone for participating in the Giveaway! Your enthusiasm for my book got me so jazzed that I want to Deck the Halls with… Wine!

Happy Holidays!

Book Giveaway

Are you on Goodreads?
You want to be on Goodreads?
Here's a reason to be on Goodreads!

Goodreads.com is a popular website just for book lovers and readers. Through it I'm hosting a Giveaway of my book Evolution of a Wine Drinker! Enter to win one of the five signed copies by clicking on the link below; then at the Goodreads site, click the "Enter to Win" button.

The Giveaway ends December 10, just in time for Christmas, so enter soon!

As I say at the betting windows at the racetrack, I've got to be "in" it to "win" it. Make sure you're "in" on my wine book Giveaway!

Thanks and good luck!

A Big Success!

"Are you going to forget what to do?"Mr. Wonderful said putting the box of books in the trunk.
"Nope," I said clutching the car keys.
"Are you nervous?"
"Nope."
"Have you ever done this before?"
"Nope!"

All week the calmer I was, the more nervous Mr. Wonderful grew. Until now, the night of my first book signing, Mr. Wonderful had morphed into a mess of nerves acting like a skittish colt before running the the biggest race of its life at Churchill Downs, and I was like a Zen Buddhist monk saying "Om"and eager to get a glass of wine in my hands. Because that's what Buddhist monks do, they say "Om" and hold glasses of wine in their hands.

This week was the very first event for my book, Evolution of a Wine Drinker. It took place at V Wine Room and included me reading an excerpt from my book, signing copies of the book and pouring glasses of wine for friends and attendees.

While Mr. Wonderful was home pacing in the pasture, I was living it up with a wonderful night of sharing my book with some funny comedy friends, some charming wine group friends and some new newly-made newbie friends. It was wonderful!

I was so thankful to the gals who spearheaded the event, V Wine Room for hosting and to everyone who came out for it! Thank you all for your support!

I was especially happy that my dear writer friend Gayle Carline could come. She'd driven six hours in her work clothes to get there. Okay, maybe it just felt like six hours because driving anywhere in Los Angeles feels like six hours. As a fellow writer, I appreciated her words of wisdom.

"If you're nervous, drink a glass of wine," she said.
"What if I'm not nervous?"
"Then still drink a glass of wine!"

I embraced Gayle's advice wholeheartedly. In fact I embraced my friends and everyone who attended.

Back at the house Mr. Wonderful met me in the driveway. I guess he'd been pacing the length and breadth of our property the whole time I'd been away.

"Did you forget what to do?" he said lifting the box of books out of the trunk.
"Nope," I said clutching the car keys.
"Were you nervous?"
"Nope."
"Will you do it again?"
"YES!"

A Gazillion and One Things!

"The stucco guy is coming today," I said tapping my pencil and reading my to-do list.

"Yes," Mr. Wonderful said putting another coffee pod in the espresso machine.

"I have to buy Thanksgiving decorations for the house."

"Maybe."

"Walgreen's is selling Christmas merchandise already."

"No!" 

I loved my spouse but Mr. Wonderful's "shock" at the ever-encroaching Christmas shopping season was over the top. But that's because I knew his reaction was feigned and honestly? I'd already had my morning teapot of caffeine. He just didn't understand why I was so worked up about the retailers this year. I explained to him how everything had a season and the coo-coo crazy, rush-rush of Christmas shopping, office parties and buying/returning gifts would arrive soon enough. But since it was still November, we should enjoy this time for its autumn leaves, brown turkeys and red wines. Actually red wines were apropos all year long. I'm very accepting of red wines. And white wines, Champagnes, Amarettos, Calvados and hot toddys with rum. 

Don't get me wrong, I loved Christmas, St. Nick, reindeer, Tiny Tim and thinking of others but I didn't want to do all that until after the turkey was stuffed, cooked and eaten, which by my calendar, was still a week a way.

Plus, the truth of the matter was that since Mr. Wonderful and I were hosting Thanksgiving Dinner at our house this year, I had a gazillion and one things to do for Thanksgiving (don't forget that "one thing"!) before I could even get to Christmas. Hence my admonition to keep the Christmas season curtailed until after Thanksgiving Day. 

My Thanksgiving preparation plans included: 1) Writing up a food list that would be as long as Santa's Naughty and Nice list; 2) Writing up a list of drinks for the day including before dinner drinks, after dinner drinks and making-dinner drinks for the chef (make it a double!); 3) Driving to the respective food and drink stores to do reconnaissance; and 4) Finding decorations to put in my house to celebrate turkeys, cooking and Pilgrims when all that was available were Christmas wreaths, Christmas ornaments and Christmas Eggnog with hot toddys. Okay, that last one was fine in my book. 

I also had the stucco guy coming to the house to repair the gaping hole in the exterior of the house. I had to get that hole patched and painted before Thanksgiving dinner and with less than a week, I was running out of time.

"It's just another day," Mr. Wonderful shrugged.

"Thanksgiving is another day like a Tesla is 'just' a car," I said pouring more tea.

"You're acting frantic," Mr. Wonderful said as I downed a third pot of Gun Powder Chinese Green Tea.

"Don't you understand?" I said, my face twitching from all that Gun Powder Green Tea. "I have a gazillion and one things to do before Thanksgiving! And I can't forget that one thing!" Then I grabbed paper, pen and shopping bags and marched toward the door.

With the door wide open we both watched as another element of November happened outside: it started to rain. A lot. A monsoon-like downpour. This would not be a problem in the rest of the world but if you live in Los Angeles you either never learned or have completely forgotten how to drive in the rain, which meant that: 1) Driving to the grocery store for reconnaissance Thanksgiving shopping was impossible (unless I wanted to end up in a fender bender in the street); 2) Driving to the wine shop to buy the Turkey Day beverages was a no go (unless I wanted to end up in a ten car pile up in the parking lot); and 3) The stucco guy couldn't repair our gaping hole today. Argh! I had a gazillion and one things to do and now I couldn't do any of them!

"Want to go for a walk?" Mr. Wonderful said.

"In the rain?" He pulled his golf umbrella from the closet and we went out in the rain. We saw the brown leaves scattered on the ground like fairy dust, we saw bare-limbed trees reaching for the sky and directly over our heads we saw the garnet and gold colors of the umbrella. I squeezed Mr. Wonderful's arm. I had a gazillion and one things to do before Thanksgiving but right now I had remembered to do that "one thing": Enjoy this time.

She Did It!

"She did it," I said reading my computer screen.
"She who?" Mr Wonderful said looking up from his graphic novel.
"She made it."
"Made what?"
"It worked!"
"Worked what?!"

We married each other, bought a house together and were fixing up said house together yet Mr. Wonderful just couldn't get on the same page with me. It was totally clear what I meant and as my spouse and the man who promised to love, honor and read my mind, he should know exactly what I was referring when I looked at my computer screen.

"Are you watching a cat video," he said, a forefinger saving his page in the graphic novel.
I waved him over and showed him what had grabbed my attention: my friend Gayle Carline's blog post. When New Yorkers think of Southern Californians, they think of an air-head, surfer type, which is the polar opposite of who Gayle is. Like totally, Dude.

First off, Gayle is not a dude. Second, 3rd, 4th, 5th and 6th, she's smart, funny, a talented horsewoman and uber busy writer. She writes a weekly humor column for the newspaper as well as a light-hearted series of mysteries set in Orange County. Seventh, she's gutsy because after I posted a "miraculous" chicken and rice recipe on my blog, this blonde dame with moxie tried it. Gayle made my recipe!

"How'd she do?" my spouse asked patting his empty belly.
"You'll have to read here to find out!"

Congrats, Gayle! Thanks for making it and reporting back!

If anyone else makes either the chicken and rice or my shrimp and lemon pasta recipes, please let me know! I'd love to hear--and see a picture--of how they turned out!

Bon Appetit!